Nursery Rhymes Lyrics

Huge Umbrella
: Sirius Sam and Jimmy
And… and Jimmy is going to come up to the front to sing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star”

Twinkle, twinkle, little star
How I wonder what you are

Now Jimmy, I’m so glad you asked
I prepared this rap just for class

Stars are balls of super hot gas
If you go ahead and touch it it’ll fry your ass
Today I’m gonna teach ya and today you’ll learn
If there’s no oxygen in space, how does the Sun burn?

That’s a good question Jimmy, but let me clarify
That ain’t no fuckin’ diamond up in the fuckin’ sky
Stars create light through photon emission
Using nuclear fusion, don’t confuse it with fission

Hydrogen combines to make helium
The core of a star’s never at a happy medium
Thе helium combines to make somеthing heavy
Like a whale shredding metal (Yeah, that’s heavy)

But Sirius Sam, why are they so bright?
That’s cause they ejaculate a fuck ton of light
The hotter it is, the bluer it gets
Hot like me—Yeah, I get bitches wet

The Sun is a star that’s local to us
But not close enough to reach on a bus
Proxima Centauri is the next nearest star
But at 4.20 light years, it’s still pretty far

NML Cygni is a really big star
Don’t make fun of its size, that’s going too far
Sirius is the very brightest star
I’m Sirius, it really is the brightest star

Alpha Centauri is actually binary
This line requires some expert rhymery
Betelgeuse, the juicy star
It’s not made of juice—I wonder what you are

That’s it, that is all the stars
There are no more stars
No, get out, get-get out, get out of my classroom
Fuck off

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